Here is a scenario about how the Inner Critic gains a foothold in our lives. Imagine you are a little kid and you go to touch something that is hot and your mother screams, “Don’t do that!” Or, you are playing in the dirt, having a grand time, and your mother says in horror, “Oh my God! We are going to grandma’s house and you’re filthy dirty!”
The Inner Critic Wants to Keep You Safe, but at What Cost?
The Inner Critic takes that criticism and turns it into a dictum: don’t get dirty; don’t disobey; be a good girl; be a good boy; and be obedient. The Inner Critic doesn’t want you to make your mommy and daddy angry. The Inner Critic wants to keep you safe. It doesn’t care if it’s crushing your curiosity and creativity in the process. It just wants you to be “good” and “safe” and to do this the Inner Critic always takes a conservative, status quo stance.
“Why” the Inner Critic Comes Into Being?
This a quick view of the “why” the Inner Critic comes into being. The problem is the Inner Critic voice begins to take over and becomes the CEO of your life. The image I use is if your mind were a radio station, basically what happens is that every station you turn to is the nagging, blathering voice of the Inner Critic. It sometimes feels as if you can’t stop the Inner Critic's assault, always accusing you of doing the wrong thing, calling you stupid, dumb, asking why did you do that? Don’t you remember the time when –– twenty thousand million years ago –– when you did this and this terrible thing happened… and so it goes and goes.
How to Defang the Inner Critic
So what do we do? How do we defang the Inner Critic? The first thing is to acknowledge the existence of your Inner Critic as a controlling voice inside your head. And to know that the Inner Critic is not all of you by any means. It is a loud voice that lives in your mind but has no access to your heart. Second part of defanging the Inner Critic is to start listening to –– I mean really becoming aware of the insistent and invasive assault that is the voice of your Inner Critic. The jabber is constant.
The Inner Critic Wants to Keep You Safe, but at What Cost?
The Inner Critic takes that criticism and turns it into a dictum: don’t get dirty; don’t disobey; be a good girl; be a good boy; and be obedient. The Inner Critic doesn’t want you to make your mommy and daddy angry. The Inner Critic wants to keep you safe. It doesn’t care if it’s crushing your curiosity and creativity in the process. It just wants you to be “good” and “safe” and to do this the Inner Critic always takes a conservative, status quo stance.
“Why” the Inner Critic Comes Into Being?
This a quick view of the “why” the Inner Critic comes into being. The problem is the Inner Critic voice begins to take over and becomes the CEO of your life. The image I use is if your mind were a radio station, basically what happens is that every station you turn to is the nagging, blathering voice of the Inner Critic. It sometimes feels as if you can’t stop the Inner Critic's assault, always accusing you of doing the wrong thing, calling you stupid, dumb, asking why did you do that? Don’t you remember the time when –– twenty thousand million years ago –– when you did this and this terrible thing happened… and so it goes and goes.
How to Defang the Inner Critic
So what do we do? How do we defang the Inner Critic? The first thing is to acknowledge the existence of your Inner Critic as a controlling voice inside your head. And to know that the Inner Critic is not all of you by any means. It is a loud voice that lives in your mind but has no access to your heart. Second part of defanging the Inner Critic is to start listening to –– I mean really becoming aware of the insistent and invasive assault that is the voice of your Inner Critic. The jabber is constant.